How to Successfully Ask for a Million-Dollar Donation: A Fundraiser’s Perspective

Securing a million-dollar donation is an art, not an accident. It’s a delicate dance of relationships, strategy, and understanding human behavior. While the amount is significant, the process of requesting such a large gift can be learned and mastered. In this blog, I’ll share the insights of seasoned fundraisers who do this for a living—how they build relationships, craft the right messaging, and successfully secure seven-figure donations.

Whether you’re leading a nonprofit, working in philanthropy, or simply curious about high-stakes fundraising, this guide will break down the process of asking for a million-dollar donation in a way that feels natural, authentic, and effective.

1. Start with the Relationship, Not the Ask

Before you can ask anyone for a million dollars, you must first build a strong relationship with the potential donor. High-net-worth individuals are approached all the time for donations, and they’ve seen every trick in the book. What sets successful fundraisers apart is the genuine effort they put into understanding the donor as a person, not just as a checkbook.

Understanding the Donor’s Motivations: The first step in relationship building is understanding why a person might want to give. Millionaires and billionaires often have specific causes they care about deeply—education, healthcare, the environment, social justice, the arts. Align your mission with their passions, but make sure the connection is authentic.

Patience and Persistence: It can take months, even years, to cultivate the right kind of relationship. Be prepared to invest time in building rapport before you even consider making the ask. Ask them questions, attend events they care about, and engage with their interests. It’s about showing that you’re just as committed to the relationship as you are to securing the donation.

Example: A major fundraiser for a prominent museum recalls how they secured a $5 million gift from a long-time donor. They spent two years fostering a genuine friendship with the donor, taking the time to learn what their family valued about the arts and culture. Only once the trust was established did they make the formal ask, and by that point, the donor felt personally connected to the museum’s mission.

2. Do Your Research

Once the relationship is built, your next move is research. You can’t expect someone to give away a million dollars without understanding their financial position, philanthropic history, and interests. Research helps you avoid embarrassing mistakes, like asking for a sum that’s either too small or too large, and allows you to tailor your pitch to the individual’s values.

Financial Capacity: Not every wealthy person is in the position to give seven-figure donations, even if they appear to be on paper. Look at their history of giving—do they typically donate large amounts? What causes have they supported in the past? Have they previously donated to organizations similar to yours?

Psychographic Research: Beyond the financials, you need to understand the emotional side of giving. What drives this person to contribute to certain causes? Do they want to leave a legacy, support a particular community, or align themselves with a social movement? Tailoring your ask to match these motivations increases the likelihood of a positive response.

Example: In one case, a nonprofit working on environmental issues sought a million-dollar gift from a prominent tech entrepreneur. After extensive research, they discovered that the entrepreneur was deeply concerned about climate change and was particularly interested in reforestation efforts. They structured their entire proposal around that, knowing it would resonate with the donor’s passion.

3. Craft a Personalized and Impact-Driven Message

After you’ve built the relationship and done your research, it’s time to create a compelling case for support. A million-dollar donor isn’t just giving away their money—they’re investing in your cause. Your job is to show them how their gift will make a transformative impact.

Tell a Story, Not Just the Numbers: Donors want to see the data, but they also want to hear a story. They want to know who will benefit from their generosity and how the world will be better because of it. Create an emotional narrative that brings your mission to life, and show them the tangible results their money will help produce.

Personalize the Impact: Connect the gift to the donor’s personal interests and values. If you’re asking for a donation to fund a new children’s hospital, and the donor has a history of supporting healthcare, emphasize how their gift will lead to cutting-edge medical treatments for children in need. Make it clear that this is more than a generic appeal—it’s a unique opportunity for them to leave a lasting legacy in an area they care about.

Clarity and Transparency: Million-dollar donors don’t want to feel like they’re writing a blank check. Be very clear about how the funds will be used, providing detailed plans and projections. Transparency builds trust and shows the donor that you take their contribution seriously.

Example: A university fundraiser once asked for a $2 million gift from an alum to fund scholarships for first-generation college students. The alum had a personal history of being the first in their family to attend college, so the ask was tailored around how this gift would give others the same opportunity that had changed their life. The emotional connection to the cause, combined with clear plans for how the scholarships would be managed, sealed the deal.

4. Choose the Right Time and Setting

Asking for a million-dollar donation is a momentous event, so timing and setting are critical. This isn’t something you do over a casual email or a rushed phone call. You need to create the right atmosphere, both for the donor and for the request.

In-Person, Face-to-Face: Whenever possible, ask for major gifts in person. It’s easier to communicate passion, trust, and sincerity when you’re sitting across from the person. This also gives you the ability to read their body language and adapt your approach in real time.

The Right Moment: Timing is everything. Don’t rush into the ask prematurely, but also don’t wait too long and miss your window. A seasoned fundraiser can often sense when the donor is ready, based on the quality of their relationship and their engagement with the organization. The key is to strike when the donor feels most connected to the mission.

Setting the Stage: Choose a setting that feels natural and comfortable for the donor, whether it’s their home, office, or a private dinner. This should be a place where both of you can speak freely and without distractions. A thoughtful setting shows that you’ve put effort into the ask and that you’re treating it with the gravity it deserves.

Example: A major gift officer once secured a $1 million donation from a long-time supporter of a healthcare nonprofit. They chose to make the ask over a private dinner at the donor’s favorite restaurant, creating a relaxed atmosphere where they could talk about the donor’s philanthropic goals and how the gift would make a lasting impact. The setting helped foster a meaningful conversation that led to a successful ask.

5. Make the Ask Bold, But Not Aggressive

When the time finally comes to ask for the donation, you have to be direct, but not pushy. There’s no room for ambiguity when you’re asking for a million dollars. Be confident in your ask, but make sure it comes from a place of mutual respect and shared goals.

Be Specific About the Amount: Don’t beat around the bush. Be clear that you’re asking for a specific amount—a million dollars or whatever the amount may be. If you’ve done your research and built the relationship properly, this shouldn’t come as a shock to the donor.

Frame It as an Opportunity: The best fundraisers don’t make donors feel like they’re parting with their money; they make them feel like they’re investing in something meaningful. Frame the ask as a partnership—an opportunity for the donor to make a lasting impact on a cause they care about deeply.

Leave Room for Discussion: After you make the ask, pause. Give the donor space to think, ask questions, or express concerns. Don’t rush to fill the silence—sometimes, the most important part of the conversation happens when you stop talking. Respect the donor’s need to process the ask and be prepared to answer any questions they have thoughtfully.

Example: In one instance, a nonprofit CEO asked for a $1.5 million gift to fund an innovative new program. They laid out the proposal clearly, framed it as a transformative opportunity for the donor to shape the future of the organization, and then waited. The donor appreciated the confident, direct approach, and after some thoughtful questions, they agreed to make the donation.

6. Follow Up with Gratitude and Ongoing Engagement

After a donor has given such a significant gift, your work isn’t done. Follow-up is critical to maintaining the relationship and ensuring the donor feels valued and appreciated. Million-dollar donors are often repeat givers, so keeping them engaged can lead to future gifts.

Gratitude is Key: After the gift is secured, a simple thank-you letter isn’t enough. Arrange a personalized follow-up that shows deep appreciation, whether it’s a handwritten note, a private dinner, or even naming a project or initiative in their honor.

Ongoing Communication: Keep the donor updated on how their gift is being used. Send regular reports, invite them to see the project in action, and keep the lines of communication open. This transparency not only shows respect but also keeps them invested in the cause.

Example: A fundraiser who secured a $3 million gift from a tech founder made a point of sending regular video updates from the field, showing the tangible impact of the donation. The donor appreciated this personal touch and later made an additional $2 million contribution.

Conclusion

Asking for a million-dollar donation is a complex process, but when done right, it can be incredibly rewarding—not just financially, but also in terms of the relationships you build and the impact you make. By focusing on genuine relationship-building, doing your research, crafting a personalized pitch, and following up with gratitude, you’ll position yourself to make successful high-level asks with confidence and grace.